When schizophrenia brought incurable pain to our house

By S. Aadinath

My mother, who is now in her 70s, suffers from mental illness. She needs constant care and we have to be doubly careful while looking after her.

Doctors have diagnosed her with schizophrenia. She began to suffer from the mental illness after my elder brother died of dengue, about five years back. Initially, we thought that she was grief-stricken and that was the perhaps the reason that she had not been her usual self.

But, over a period of time we noticed that her condition was continuing to worsen and it was increasingly becoming difficult to manage her mental health. She would start talking to herself, throw things and behave in a manner that we did not quite understand. In fact, we were at our wits end, not knowing what to do.

My father and I decided to take her to the hospital and the doctors informed us that she needs the help of a mental health expert.

After careful evaluation, we were told that our mother suffers from schizophrenia and the most probable cause could be the death of my elder brother. The doctors explained that sometimes an emotional trigger like the death of a close one can cause it.

The doctors gave her medication and advised us to look after her. But, that was easier said than done.

We were completely unprepared for this phase of our life. After taking her medication, my mother became very calm. It was unnatural. Whenever the effect of the medicine wore off, she would be back to her schizophrenic self.

The room had to be specially prepared for her. We advised our father from sleeping in it. Every sharp object was removed from the room so that she would not hurt herself – or us – by mistake.

It was becoming increasingly difficult to manage and we did not have healthcare options before us.

Our sister is settled in Canada and we even thought of shifting my mother there so that could get good care in a health care institution. But my father did not agree. He insisted that he would look after her till he was alive.

My father began to read up and tried to train himself to manage a patient of schizophrenia. It was only his love for my mother that kept my father going. It was quite distressing to see it unfold in such a manner. In the evening of his life, when my father should have got some peace and quiet, he was now struggling to take care of a schizophrenic patient.

Mental health is hardly discussed in everyday life, but that needs to change.

Even today, my father and I are struggling to take care of my mother who suffers from schizophrenia.

We have to ensure that she takes her medication on time. We have to look after her every need. It is an uphill task.

I now worry about my elderly father and wonder how long he will be able to take this. It is quite frustrating, without any respite in sight.

For me, I have now my mother who is sick and a father whose health is failing. Life is definitely a struggle.

Read: Living with an elderly parent: Reality versus Expectation