When Carnatic music brought solace to my dying mother

By Anna Rose

“Please take her home,” said the attending doctor as he again read the latest medical reports of my mother who was suffering from a debilitating lung disease that made it difficult for her to breathe without oxygen support.

The doctor was gentle. He explained that nothing much can be done for my 81-year old mother who was lying in the hospital bed.

“It is best that she is treated at home where she will be amongst her near and dear ones,” the doctor said.

I was afraid that the day will eventually come when modern medicine would not be able to provide solace to my elderly mother.

So, I went home and made arrangements for her last days. She could not have stayed at her own flat in Chennai and my home was the best bet. I turned one of my bedrooms into a makeshift hospital room, complete with a special bed and an oxygen cylinder.

I brought my mother home in an ambulance and took her to the room. That was the last she was outdoors.

The relatives and friends were informed and they all trooped in to meet her. But, I noticed that she didn’t look happy with all the gloomy faces.

It was then that I decided to play her favourite Carnatic music and immediately she cheered up. The change was quite evident.

I lowered the volume and played Carnatic music and she began to look forward to it. She would have her good days and bad days. However, good music almost always cheered her up.

The music would especially be put on whenever there were visitors so that there was no gloomy atmosphere at home. I knew that she was on her deathbed. But, that didn’t mean that her last days had to be morose.

A week before she died, she insisted that I spend time with her. She would make me put on Carnatic music and made me sit on her bedside, holding hands. That was all she wanted. She would close her eyes and her frail hands would gently caress my hands.

This became our routine throughout the week. We would quietly listen to the music. It was so soothing. In fact, it had a calming effect on both of us.

I was aware that she was about to leave us. The music, however, made the process bearable.

It was a regular morning when she left for heavenly abode. I was sitting at her bedside. Carnatic music was softly playing.

My mother’s youngest brother was sitting in the drawing room, while my cousin sister was in the kitchen preparing the breakfast.

The curtains had been parted and the sun was shining bright.

My mother’s breathing became laboured even though the oxygen supply was functioning well.

I immediately called my uncle and my sister and they too realised that the end was near.

I held my mother’s frail hand while my uncle held her other hand.

Within minutes, she was gone.

When she left, she was surrounded her near and dear ones with her favourite Carnatic music playing in the background.

Read: Life with my mother who has Alzheimer’s